Thanksgiving 2004

Thanksgiving, November 25, 2004
Topic: Change
Scripture: John 15 (Vine and Branches, Love God, Love each Other), Luke 10 (parable of the good samaritan)

Going into jail on Thanksgiving is interesting. The guys (inmates) are usually surprised that the Yokefellow volunteers still come to prison when the session night falls on a Holiday. But I think that it's especially important to maintain a regular, weekly schedule with the small group sessions.

This sort of showed in the song request. One guy wanted to sing "America the Beautiful". So we sang it together. There are a handful of patriotic songs in the donated hymnals in the room.

We had a small turnout for the session. Some of our regulars have been released or transferred recently. This happens often with county jails. State and Federal prisons have people with longer sentences, so Yokefellow groups there tend to have the same participants longer.

Then, part way through the session a few of the guys got called out for visits, which gave us an even smaller group. Numbers of participants is not as important to me as it was when I was just starting out. I trust that God knows who to bring to each session.

Usually I have a topic I intend to use for small group discussion before I go into the jail. Tonight I did not. I trusted a topic would come up, and it did: Change.

The topic of change is a fascinating one. What does it take to change? Whether a person wants to stop using drugs and alcohol, quit smoking, lose weight or lead a more contemplative life, what does it take to change?

Many of the inmates we meet express a desire to change for the better. The obstacles are many. Old friends, towns, habits are in the way. Temptation is present.

Too many times we've had a Yokefellow group participant that seemed to be doing well in the group, caring for others, increasing their bible reading, prayer and meditation. And then a week comes when they don't show up. Word comes that they are in isolation or SMU as a result of getting a "write-up" by the guards for being disobedient, an angry outburst or an attack on another person.

Discussion questions: What would you like to change in your life? What steps are you taking to change? What plans do you have for continuing the change once you are released from prison? Why do you think it is hard to change?

Miscellaneous discussion topics or questions

This is a posting of discussion topics I've heard while in small Yokefellow groups.

1. Scripture: Prodigal Son, Questions: Has anyone ever given you a second chance? Has God? Describe.
2. If you could interview anyone, living or dead, who would it be? What questions would you ask? (I heard this one topic take up a whole session very nicely)
3. Explain PH, how there is acid and alkaline PH levels. Sour and Sweet. Questions: What PH are you (figuratively speaking), why? What PH do you want to be?
4. God chooses David. Scripture: 1 Samuel 16 - Questions: Do you think David's brothers liked him? Did your brothers / sisters like you? How do you think the brothers felt when they were not chosen? How do you think David felt when he was chosen and blessed? Have you ever been blessed by a pastor? God sees our inside. He sees our hearts and hears our prayers. God knows what potential lies inside us. God might be choosing you for a special job.
5. Scripture: Judges 6 and 7, story of Gideon. Did God allow Gideon to grow in Faith with small tasks? How has God trained you? Gideon took on a battle against incredible odds. God gave him the victory. What challenges are you facing? Do you think God will help you? Will a victory bring glory to God?

Consecration (continued - part 4)

Scripture: John 15 (Vine and Branches)

We're usually in a large multipurpose room. We were in the prison library tonight. We had enough room for the guys that showed up, but it would have been too small for some of our discussion sessions. There was a table which we gathered our chairs around. Usually we don't have a table, we form a circle with our chairs. In the early days, I spoke from a podium. That's long over! Now, I see that it is so important for everyone to be on the same level for a good discussion.

Since we were in the library, the inmates looked in the book case for some bibles. They came up with a big old beautiful Strong's exhaustive concordance. We proceeded to have a short side lesson on what a concordance is (a large index of all the words used in the bible along with Greek and Hebrew dictionaries and references to all words to the dictionaries.) Most guys had never used a concordance and it was a good 5 minutes of discovering something new for them.

This is a good insight to a good small group discussion session. Our guys like to learn new things. I think most people do, it may be a human trait. Hearing the same old thing every week doesn't work, doesn't draw people into the discussion. But learning something new, together, in an unthreatening way, works well. Perhaps it's because everyone is on equal ground since it's a new subject?

We've been talking about how our lives become fruit for God as we walk in faith. We become kinder, more forgiving, more loving, more forgiving. Tonight we talked about what traits we got from our parents. Good and bad ones. Then we talked about children. What traits have our children picked up from us? Good and bad ones. Why?

Then I wrapped up the session by saying the more time we spend with God, our Father, the more we will pick up His traits of forgiveness and mercy and love and honesty and so on. Let us be children of God and grow in his likeness as we walk in the faith of his son Jesus.

Discussions: What traits do you have that your parents had? What traits are your children picking up from you? Is God our Father? What traits does he have? How can we pick up these traits?

Consecration (continued week 3)

Topic: Consecration
November 11, 2004.

We continued on the theme of consecration. I don't think we used that word, but that's what the theme is. Sometimes using religious terms turns people off, so we use simpler terms. In this county jail the average education level is ninth grade.

Communication in this setting means using terms that are understood without much explanation.

We read Psalm 22. Each person around the discussion circle read a verse. Then we discussed difficult words and terms and shared our thoughts on what the Psalm says to us today. Recently we've been working on memorizing some Psalms (23 and 24 so far), which as turned out well.

Next, I took a risk.. I gave the other 2 volunteers a heads up about this before I did it (outside, before we went in to the jail). I told the inmates that I was pregnant. I left them think this for less than a minute, during which the conversation included talk about how a baby would limit our prison visits. Then, I admitted to the guys that I had lied, and that I wasn't pregnant. The point was, that saying something does make it true. Sooner or later (in this case, several months) the truth becomes known.

This is true in our lives, too. Sooner or later our "fruit" becomes obvious to others. Are we growing to be more loving or are we remaining grumpy old snappy people.

Scriptures:
Isaiah 58. (True Fasting)

John 15:5"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.

Saying we are Christian does not mean it is so. Where is the fruit of the relationship with Jesus?

Consecration (continued - part 2)

Scripture
Luke 13:6 - the fig tree that did not bear fruit

Discussion Points:
What would you do to the fig tree if you were the landowner in this story?
Are you bearing fruit now? What kind of fruit? How long until you think you will bear fruit?

Consecration (part 1)

Scripture: John 15:4 - Jesus talkes about the Vine and branches.

Last week as we walked out of the prison, I heard one of our regular attendees talking rough to a woman in the visiting area - through the glass and using the telephone connection.

It hit me that we needed to talk about consecration, how knowing and loving God affects your life and comes out in visible ways.

So this week we read and discussed John chapter 15 and talked about how, if we're connected to God, our fruit will resemble the parent plant.

Discussion points:
Are you connected to another source? What? What happens to a branch that is disconnected from the main vine? How do you know if you are connected to the source? How can you get connected? If you are not connected to God, what might you be connected to?

What a Yokefellow session is.

The Yokefellow sessions we lead are 90 minutes long. There is one session per week at the prison we go to.

Our understanding of small groups has developed since 1994 when we first went into a Federal prison with a Yokefellow group from our church. At first, my husband and I treated the 90 minutes more like a bible study. But now we understand it a bit better.

Here's an outline of our sessions:

Gathering - we (volunteers) come early, set up several chairs, get our bibles and song books and spend a bit of time in prayer before the inmates show up.

Greeting - we welcome the men as they some into the room, calling as many by their first name as we can remember from previous sessions. The men get their bibles and songbooks and pull up chairs and form a circle. Everyone is on the same level.

Beginning prayer - Someone will pray and ask God to join the group. Sometimes my husband gives the prayer, sometimes one of the inmates will give the prayer.

Introductions - we go around the room, in order, and everyone gives their first name and says how they are doing. This allows for a broad response. Often the answer is "I'm doing OK" or "I thank God for waking me up this morning." while sometimes the answer has to do with recent legal proceedings or family news. The Yokefellow volunteers also introduce themselves.

Song - We offer to lead the group in song. This is optional. Most sessions we do sing several songs. The favorites are Amazing Grace, Blessed Assurance, Jesus Loves Me and Leaning on the Everlasting Arms.

Psalm reading - We read a selection from the book of Psalms. We all take a turn reading a verse or a sentence of the Psalm. We stop for difficult words and talk about their meaning and their use in the Psalm. We point out key themes of the Psalm. We ask the inmates if they have ever felt the way the Psalm writer is describing (example: "Have you ever felt as though you were walking through the valley of the shadow of death?").

Recently we've been encouraging the guys to try to memorize some Psalms. Then during sessions we allow time for the fellows who want to recite them to do so. Imagine waiting for 4 hours in a holding room at the court house, waiting for your court session, having nothing to read or do. Recite comforting Psalms from memory can make a real difference in attitude for walking in the court room when the call finally comes. Or, it can help when you get told you're going back to prison and your session has been rescheduled and you won't be seeing the judge today.

Bible reading - Next, we read the scripture that is the basis for the lesson. Many times it's a parable. We've taught on Adam and Eve, Moses, Abraham, Jacob, Joseph, Gideon, David and other Old Testament favorites. Jesus and grace are obviously top topics. We take turns (going around the room in order) reading the scripture. Sometimes we re-read sections over. We talk about what the verses mean, what they meant then, what they mean now, what they mean to us today.

Discussion - I try to ask questions that help make the men think things through. Often I'll tell a story from my life and then ask questions like "what should I do?, what would you do?" Then. I'll turn the situation around and the guys can see that they have a similar situation and option for faith.

It's important to understand how important this discussion part is. Everyone's voice is welcome. Everyone's opinion is valued. Of course, we need to maintain order and respect. That's the leader's job to quiet the group down when they get out of order, but still welcome good thoughtful discussion. It's through discussion that we can share, bond and learn from each other.
Sometimes, during a session, an older inmate will give a young inmate some advice. Like, "Don't be like me kid, when you get out, stay clean and don't throw your life away like I have". This advice, given by an inmate is worth a million words given by me, a middle class white lady.

Yokefellow circle - To end the session, we stand, join hands (hand over hand usually) and offer prayer. Sometimes my husband offers prayer on behalf of the whole group. Sometimes we go around the group and take turns praying.

Sometimes I'll give the inmates homework, like a chapter of Bible to read to prepare for next week's session.

Starting Out

Welcome. This blog will be primarily for posting discussion topics well suited for small Christian discussion groups, especially suited for Yokefellow Prison Ministry Groups.

My husband, Lou, and I have been active in Yokefellow Prison Ministry since 1994. From this experience I'm an advocate of small discussion groups. It's amazing to experience growth in myself and see similar growth in others.

I welcome your comments. Feel free to share your small group topics, too.
- Kathy