Obedience

Topic: Obedience
4 Yokefellow volunteers and 19 inmates gathered together to seek God this night.

We started with each person around the circle of chairs offering a prayer. We then had introductions and sang several songs. It's amazing how group singing can build a sense of community among a diverse bunch of people.

We went around the circle, each person reading a verse of Psalm 18 until we had completed the Psalm. Then we went to the Gospel texts listed here.

Bible Scriptures to consider:
Psalm 18:44 “As soon as they hear of me, they shall obey me
John 14:23-25 - "If anyone loves me…”
John 15:10 – “If you obey my commands…”
Luke 11:27-29 – “Blessed rather are those who…”
Matt. 21:27-31 – “A certain man had two sons…”

Discussion questions
Do you expect people who love you to obey you?
Do you obey people that you love?
What part does power play in obedience?
Why do you think obedience is important to God?
What commands do you think we are to obey?

Week Off - thoughts on new birth

This is the week of the month that another person of the Yokefellow Prison Ministry team goes into the prison instead of us.

I heard Howard Fineman on the radio one morning this past week. He was saying how a friend of his is in Iraq and how he corresponds with him regularly. His friend says that the Iraq people have lived in a tribal society for 5000 years and not only don't they know what democracy is, they have no desire for it either. He says that if one guy builds a pipeline another guy wants to tear it up.

Hearing this made me think of Jay Winik's book "April 1865". In a TV interview he remarked that one of the amazing things about the end of the American Civil War was that the people actually stopped fighting. In some countries the civil war goes on for generations (consider Ireland).

It made me wonder if the difference might not be related to the fact that the land ownership (setting aside for this discussion the native Americans) in America was just a generation or two old. Howard Fineman's friend says that tribes in Iraq have fought for 5000 years and do not want peace. Are the scars too old? Is that a reason America was able to move forward in peace in 1865?

This then, made me think of John 3:2-4 - no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again. Hmmm. How entrenched are we in our life up to this point? How willing are we to wipe the land of our lives clean and let go of property and ownership and commit an unconditional surrender to God and live in peace? Or do we invite God into our lives and then have a 40 year civil war with Him? Maybe He builds a building in our life and as soon as He's done we tear it down.

Following Jesus is a radical change in a person's life. It means giving up ownership of one's self to a higher cause, an unseen higher power.

During the internal civil war, one may ask, "Where is this peace that Jesus spoke about, that attracted me to him so?" But in a war one side must surrender to have peace.

In Yokefellow small groups, we advance the idea that God exists and He cares about each person. Because He cares about each person we should too. Many people who come to a Yokefellow group are in a civil war inside of themselves. Perhaps they see that they need God or feel that they want to know God. But the old man is so alive and struggling. Anguish is the result. Is this rebellion something they have to live through, or could better teaching help them come through the war to surrender? I don't know. My own surrender has taken years and continues each day.

The story of the two swords - by Kathy Kolb

A story I wrote and tell to show how, if we believe in something, we will act according to that belief.

Once, in a kingdom not so far away in a time that seems not so long ago, a mighty King ordered two swords to be made for him.

The blacksmith, excited to get this command from his King, readied his tools, heated the metal and began the lengthy process of making the swords.

As the blacksmith began forming the sword with his huge hammer, one of the swords spoke out, “Hey! Stop pounding on me with that hammer!” The blacksmith, shocked because a sword was speaking to him, threw the sword down on the table and said, “But the King has given me orders to make him fine swords! To make you both sharp and strong, I must hammer you many times - there is no other way to perfect your steel.”, “Then do not make me as he wants. Spare me the pain, I beg of you. Leave me be as I am.” The sword asked.

The blacksmith thought this through for awhile and saw that he could not make the sword into a quality it had no desire to be. So he gently polished the sword, shining it to a mirror finish and put it in its case, knowing it was neither strong nor sharp, but it looked good to the untrained eye.

The blacksmith spoke to the second sword as he prepared to heat it in his fiery forge, “I suppose you are going to complain too? You are made from the same metal as they other sword.” “No,” replied the second sword “I heard what you said to my brother. We are meant for the King. I believe what you say about strength only coming from the fire. Do what you must to make me perfect for the King.” And the blacksmith spent more time on the making of this sword than any other he had ever made, encouraged by the cooperation of the sword itself.

The day came when the swords, packed in identical cases, were delivered to the palace of the King. His servants brought the swords into his chamber, where the King opened the cases and examined the swords carefully, lifting each one in his hand and swinging them, checking for balance and strength. When finished he commanded of the first sword, “Take this sword to the Dining Hall and place it up on the wall as a decoration piece – it is of no use for battle, it is good only as a wall ornament.” And it was done as he commanded.

Then he grasp the second sword, the one that went through many more heatings and hammerings. A pleased look crossed his face as he lifted it high, “This is the finest sword I’ve ever held. It will be my prime battle sword, wielded in my right hand and will aid me in many battles to come."

And so it was.

Following Jesus: Slight adjustment or radical change?

We started the small group session with prayer around the circle, asking God to join us. This helps get our eyes off of ourselves, and onto God. The inmate's prayers range from simple to complex. Some were beautiful.

Through the 10+ years of prison ministry it becomes obvious to me that the word of another inmate is worth much more than my words. I am a white, middle aged, middle class woman with almost nothing in common with the male inmates that we minister to. If, in the course of a session, I can facilitate an older inmate telling a younger inmate how to go straight, his words will mean much more than they would coming from me. He's walked that path and knows a lot of things I don't know.

So, the inmates opening prayers have the added benefit of showing the newcomers, right from the beginning of the session, that the inmates' are serious about this God stuff.

We then went around the circle, each person saying their first name and saying how they are doing. We had several new people join us tonight, making for a large group. This means the group leader (tonight - me) has to really stay aware of group dynamics and keep their eye open for signs someone wants to contribute something to the group (talk).

We then sang 3 songs; Amazing Grace, What a Friend we have in Jesus and Just a Closer Walk with Thee. The guys didn't want to stop singing. They went back and repeated a verse again in Just Closer Walk. I started laughing pretty hard, but I finally started playing the guitar again to the finish of the verse. We all had a good laugh about it.

We read Psalm 27 then 127, around the circle, each person reading a verse. I asked the group what we talked about last week. That helps them remember the thread and direction of the teaching. One of the questions for thinking on last week was "Is following Jesus a slight adjustment or radical change?" I asked the group that question, gave time for a good discussion, then we went to the readings for the lesson.

Matthew 18:1-9 "unless you change and become like little children"
Matthew 5:21-45 "But I say"

As the scriptures were read, we discussed what we thought they meant. Does this sound like a minor adjustment or a major change? Hmmm. The guys thought it through. Some said that for someone raised Christian in a Christian home that following Jesus was a minor change, but if a person came to Christ at an older stage, it would be a radical change. While disappointed at this answer, it told me where the some of the guys were at.

The 4 Yokefellow volunteers suggested that following Jesus is a radical change from following self. We talked about how hard is it to die to self everyday. We shared personal stories that showed the difference. One example is saying the Lord's prayer when you are mad at someone. You get to "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us" and you see that you can't go on in the prayer without forgiving that person. Everyone. It's awesome for spouses (and families) to pray the Lord's prayer together. You can't stay mad or hold a grudge and say that prayer truthfully. It's a wonderful prayer.

Some of the guys still wanted to hold on to their anger. Some of them said people's lies had put them in jail, cost them their jobs and caused their families serious hardships.

This is serious stuff.

I asked the group what the difference is between the sun and the moon. Turns out there are a lot of differences, but finally we got to the one that I was looking for. The Sun creates light, the moon reflects the sun's light. It has no light of its own. It can only "shine" when part of it is exposed to the Sun.

We went around the group with the question: Are you more of a "Sun" or a "Moon" - do you shine of yourself or do you reflect God's love through you to others? Hmmm. Quite a good bit of discussion on this one. Since I ask the question, I'm usually the last person to answer. I'm a sun more often than I want to be.

Married to God, but dating Becky Sue

We started the session a little differently tonight. I suggested that one volunteer offer prayer to God, then we went around the whole group, each person who wanted to, offering a short prayer to God, aloud, also. Many of the prayers were simply beautiful. The inmates said they liked the new opening.

We Read Pslam 150, it is short, so we had to read it several times to get all the way around the circle of people. It's praise. We're trying to remind the men how it is good to offer praise to God because he is worthy of it. It also takes our eyes off of ourselves, and that's a usually good thing.

We sang two songs. At this point we were half way thru the 90 minute session and I was getting a little impatient to get to the lesson for the evening. But the inmates wanted to sing another song. OK, another song. One guy wanted to sing for the rest of the session. Nah. But we sang the one more song.

Ok. The lesson. We asked how people's personal prayer time was going. We've been encouraging the inmates to reach for one hour of prayer a day, each day, to see it as a "God Visit". The reports weren't great. Most people have reasons why they can't give God one hour in prayer. It doesn't even have to be one hour at a time, it can be 30 mins in the morning, 30 at night, or whatever. But the guys are having real trouble setting that time aside for God. Very interesting.
I asked the guys to think about when they were in love with someone. To think about how they felt, how they always wondered what she was doing, and calling her, and being with her and so on. I referenced the Psalms, as a deer pants for water in a desert.....

Then I asked them to think about a relationship that was more of an obligation, like work, or homework. How you get up in the morning and know you have to do something for the person, but you put it off. Then lunchtime comes and you put it off more. Then dinner comes and you still haven't done the chore and then it's 10pm and you realize you didn't get it done.

After a moment to think, I asked the guys to consider, to themselves privately, which relationship more accurately describes where they are at with God currently. We gave them time to think on that.

One guys said that he feels since God is always there, he is sort of an obligation. And that sometimes he wants to stray and then return to God. Talk like this can be very insightful and can tell you where a group of people are spiritually. Listen to how the other people in the group respond when someone opens up honestly like that. Be careful not to tell the person they are wrong. It's where they are at. At least they are being honest with you. Isn't that what we want? If you shut someone down verbally, they may not open up again and certainly may not be as honest with you. And if you can't be honest with the group there is trouble. So, even if something shocks you, thank them for sharing and ask for other people to comment.

So I used an illustration. I said that some of us come to the dance with God, but want to leave with Becky Sue (a made up name). And Becky Sue is a sorry looking gal. But that's what we want to leave the dance with. Lots of people had comments on that thread.

We went to Matthew 6 (read it in NIV) (read it in The Message) and then Matthew 16 (read NIV) (read The Message). You can't serve two masters. You can't date two gods and keep them both happy. The really sad thing is, Becky Sue ain't even a god and she's ugly as sin, dirty as a sewer, personable as a pourcupine and there's no future in a relationship with her. Compared to the beauty of God, our creator, who loves us, she's a pile of dung. But that's what attracts us.

The guys didn't seem to like this message. It's amazing how we don't want to surrender our little handful of soon to die, weak, disease ridden, rotten flesh over to God in exchange for his perfect, loving, accepted, healed, eternal life. We like to stay in control. God help us.

I asked the guys if they have thought much about something we talked about several weeks ago. I had read Matthew 5:22-24 (read passage in The message). I asked the inmates what a person should do if they had negatively impacted someone in past. Like introduce them to drug abuse. The room got quiet as people were thinking. Then, several guys said that since God forgave them, that's the end of it, things are clean. I asked if we weren't to do something to offset the harm we had done in the past. As some guys argued that there's nothing they can do now, one guy got very serious and asked, "What if you sold dope to the whole village?" and he was serious. I said I didn't know.

My hope is that the inmates that come out of jail would someday be part of the solution to drug abuse in town. That not only would they stay off drugs, but would be positive influence for others too.

The camera that never got used

I used this illustration during a recent Yokefellow session.

A grandmother wanted more pictures of her grandchildren as they grew up. The family wasn't taking many pictures and the pictures they did take weren't very good quality. So, at Christmas time she went to Circuit City with another family member who had experience with digital photography and knew quite a bit about cameras.

They picked out a really good Kodak digital camera with good zoom, nice LCD display and an HP color photo printer with the builtin card reader to go with the good digital camera. Christmas day, the family with the grandkids got the digital camera and printer as gifts.

The printer got hooked up within a month, but the camera remained in the box. There was some confusion about how to charge the internal battery pack. So it didn't get used. A couple of months later, a friend helped them find the charger and charge the batteries and take a couple of pictures.

But the camera still wasn't used then. Perhaps there was the thought that the battery charger cord had been lost, but it hadn't been. Somehow the family got the impression early on that the camera didn't work, or was missing a needed piece or something and the camera was not being used at all. It wasn't kept charged up and ready for use, it wasn't used.

Eventually, the family friend that knows digital cameras stopped in and checked the gear out and found that the battery pack needed replacement due to lack of use (after a year). So, she bought them a replacement battery pack, charged it up and showed them again how to use the camera. She even had the kids take some pictures and they seemed to enjoy using the camera.

But the camera remained largely unused.

One day, there was a special event taking place that the grandmother could not attend. She asked the family, "Please, take the camera, take pictures for me so I can see some of the ceremony." But the family said, "We don't know where the camera is, and it's not charged, and it needs a battery or something. Perhaps we can stop at a store and get a disposable camera if we have time, but we probably won't have time to do that and they don't take good pictures anyway."

The point is, they never accepted the gift of the camera. Sure, they had it in their home. But they never saw it as theirs. As really theirs. It never became part of their lives. An option to use. A tool to produce something worthwhile and worth sharing.

What gifts have we been given that we never really accepted?

I've been reading "The Cost of Discipleship" by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. I tried reading this book years ago (20 years ago - can it be that long ago? yes) and had trouble understanding it. Now, it's making sense. He writes about "cheap grace" vs. "costly grace". Yes. Yes. Yes.

For so long I've had the camera, but haven't appreciated it's value, purpose or presence.

Just having the camera in the house doesn't change a thing, does it?